Bled Space 2
by Leon XIII
Summary: Isaac must once again enter the realm that is bad Survival horror Games, this time on the Sprawl which he thinks is haunted by his dead girlfriend! WHoops, spoiler alert! Oh well, you probably read the first one, so read this one you douchebag.
1. Chapter 1

Bled Space 2

Chapter 1: Default Hospital Level

**It was a nice Vacation. I was able to finish a couple babyfur stories. But now I have to get back to boring old Parodies, such as this one. ****Sorry it took so long, I was still focusing on some of my Babyfur stories. Let me know if your a babyfur by the way, I love meeting new babyfurs.**

A video link of a guy in bed opened. He was clutching a charmander plushie. Then, a small window with a blonde girl opened.

"Oh sorry. I forgot it was your nap time." The girl said.

"Oh don't worry. It's always good to see you Nicole." The guy said.

"Listen, are you alright with my new job?" The girl asked.

"Of course. I've always loved that profession" The guy said before a look of confusion appeared on his face. "What was your job again?"

"I'm a medical officer on the USG Ishimura." The girl said.

"Oh right! Uhh, the Ishumira? What the hell kind of name is that?" The guy asked.

"It's Ishimura. Are you sure I should stick with this?" Nicole asked.

"Of course. It's not like your going to get invaded by monsters." Isaac said.

Suddenly, the feed began to break up. A doctor began speaking to the man who was on the video, who is now in a straight jacket across from him.

"Mr. Clarke, do you remember this?" The Doctor asked.

"I, uh, huh, wha." The man said.

"Mr. Clarke, what happened to you on that ship?" The Doctor asked.

"My, babeh runned off." The man said.

"Oh god, I shouldn't have given him hallucinogens." The Doctor said.

The Doctor then began interviewing another person. It was a man in a blue vest over his straight jacket.

"Now Mr. Osmond, why did you go to the Ishimura?" The Doctor asked.

"All I wanted to do was go to a fucking scavenger sale. Is that too much to ask?" The man asked.

"A scavenger sale? Who told you that?" The doctor asked.

"My arch-enemy, Theodore Holmes." Richard said.

"And what happened to this Theodore Holmes?" The Doctor asked.

"He got flattened on that stupid planet." Richard said.

Meanwhile, on Aegis 7...

2 guys in engineering suits like the ones Isaac wore were looking around the volatile landscape.

"What kind of brand is this Marker? Is it a sharpie?" The first asked.

"No, it's some stupid obelisk thing." The other said.

"Then why don't we call it The obelisk" The first asked.

"What the hell is this?" The second one asked.

The guy picked up a scorched Parka.

"Why don't you put that on? Your always saying your 'too cool for the ladies'." The first one said.

"Oh fuck off." The second one said.

"Jesus Christ!" The first one yelled.

"What the-holy fucking shitballs!" The second one yelled.

There was a pair of scorched legs on the ground as well.

"What the hell happened?" The first one asked.

"Some moron must have fell into some machinery." The second said.

"But there isn't any machinery around here!" The first said.

"Well, maybe there was before this place exploded." The second said.

"This place didn't explode, it was impacted by it's extruded crust." The first said.

"Oh shut up." The second said.

The first guy picked up the legs and held them against his torso.

"Look at me, I'm that bitch from _Mortal Kombat_!" The first guy said.

"She has extra arms, not legs." The second guy said.

"Nerd." The first muttered.

"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!?" The second one demanded.

The second soldier tackled the first one.

Back on the undisclosed location...

"By the way, do you like Hot Wheels? I'm a Hot Wheels salesman." Richard said.

"I-" The doctor started.

"Here, let me show you a sample." Richard said.

Richard slipped off his shoe and reached his foot into the pocket of his vest. He pulled out a hot wheels car with his toes and laid it on the table.

"That there is a limited edition ice cream truck." Richard said.

"This is boot legged." The doctor said.

"No it isn't." Richard said.

"It's colored with Finger paint. In fact, I think this is a matchbox car." The Doctor said.

"How dare you accuse me of bootlegging! That car is one of only 5!" Richard said.

"uh huh." The doctor said, writing on his computer.

The next patient was a woman with red hair.

"Alyessa Vincent, captain of the Ishimura's security. Can you tell me what happened on the ship?" The doctor asked.

"Didn't you interview the others? It was BLEEP attacked by monsters!" Vincent yelled.

"Now now, theres no need for harsh language." The doctor said.

"I don't give a BLEEP! And why are you bleeping this?" Vincent asked.

"This is a T rated fan fic." The doctor said.

"No it isn't." Vincent said.

"Yes it is." The doctor said.

"Check it yourself." Vincent said.

The doctor went to fan fiction net and looked up the story.

"Oh, it is M rated. And whose this adorable diaper wearing dragon on the author's avatar?" The doctor asked.

"That is the author. Thats why it's his avatar you retard." Vincent said.

"Really? I didn't know the author was a babyfur." The doctor said.

"Can we just get on with the story? Your scaring the readers." Vincent said.

"Very well. What happened on the Ishimura?" The doctor asked.

"I just fucking told you!" Vincent said.

The next patient was a woman with brown hair.

"So Rebecca, your Married to Mr. Osmond?" The doctor asked.

"Where is he!?" Rebecca demanded.

"Don't worry, hes in stasis." The doctor said.

"What the hell does that mean?" Rebecca demanded.

"Can you tell me what happened on the Ishimura?" The doctor asked.

"What the hell is an Ishimura?" Rebecca asked.

"I guess not." The doctor said, writing on his computer.

The next patient was a girl with black hair and a tattoo below her eye.

"Now Miss Conner, what was your business on the Ishimura?" The Doctor asked.

"I was just kidnapped by this screwed up guy who wanted to experiment on me!" Faith said.

"Who was that man?" The doctor asked.

"You know what? Screw this." Faith said, getting up and running away.

"Security, we have a breach." The doctor said on an intercom.

2 security guards tried to apprehend Faith, but she drop kicked them both. It took 12 guards to tackle her to the ground.

The next patient was an anthropomorphic Gecko with purple stripes running down his back.

"Now, can you tell me what happened on the Ishimura?" The doctor asked.

"Whats an Ishimura?" The Gecko asked.

"OH FOR FUCKS SAKE!" The doctor yelled, smashing his computer.

The doctor called Isaac Clarke back into the room.

"Mr Clarke, I'm begging you. We've made absolutely no progress with any of the other patients. So please, what happened on the Ishimura?" The doctor asked, almost crying.

Suddenly, Isaac saw the blonde girl he was talking to in the background, next to a weird obelisk thing. She climbed up on the desk of the doctor, who was bawling uncontrollably. She moved her legs in a seductive manner before shoving her face in Isaac's face and screaming. Light flooded from her mouth and eyes, blinding Isaac.

When Isaac's vision returned, there was a guy in a green suit with a flashlight in front of him.

"Oh my god Nicole, what happened to your face!?" Isaac asked, shocked.

"My name is Franco. I'm here to get you out." The dude said.

"_Bioshock Infinite_ reference." Isaac said.

"Hang on, let me get this straight jacket off." Franco said.

Franco stuck his flashlight in his mouth so he could use both of his hands to free Isaac. Unfortunately, his teeth let go of it and it slid into his throat and started choking.

"It's kinda of a bad time to play charades, but I'm all in! Okay, uhhh, shot in the throat! No? Okay, uhhh, about to vomit! No?" Isaac asked.

"Heim...lich..." Franco muttered.

"Hey! No talking! Let's see, being choked by Corvo!" Isaac said.

Suddenly, an infector necromorph climbed onto Franco's back and stabbed it's tongue into his forehead. Franco grew a new set out arms out of his shoulders and his jaw fell off.

"Oh! Being transformed into a slasher! Definitely being transformed into a slasher." Isaac said.

Franco threw the infector off and growled in Isaac's face.

"Oh, your not playing charades are you?" Isaac asked.

Isaac slammed his head into Franco's, knocking him down. Isaac jogged past him and started running down the hall. Several other slashers and Infectors appeared. There were people in holding cells getting slaughtered.

"Hey! Can you let us out!?" One guy demanded.

"OH sure, just let me-" Isaac started.

Isaac realized his arms were trapped inside the straight jacket.

"Oh. Hang on, maybe I can open it with my feet." Isaac said.

Isaac pressed the cell's keypad with his toes.

"Damn it, I don't know the code." He said.

Isaac looked up and saw the guy in the cell get converted by an infector necromorph.

"Oh, I guess theres no point opening this then." Isaac said.

Isaac ran down the corridor and as he ran through a doorway, he was tackled to the floor by a slasher. It stabbed it's one arm blade into Isaac's shoulders.

"Oh my god! It's the first game all over again!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac kicked the slasher in the face until it was shoved off and sliced in half by a conveniently placed door.

"Whew, that was close, I didn't even get a scratch." Isaac said.

Then Isaac noticed the Slasher's arm was still stuck in his shoulder.

"Oh well, no ones perfect." Isaac said.

Isaac wandered down the now somewhat safe hallway. He saw a console with a camera on the wall.

"Oh goody! I was hoping to run into one of these again!" Isaac said, excited.

Since his arms were still binded, Isaac bashed his head against the button and the console unfolded. Unfortunately, he couldn't save his game because his hard drive was full of save files from the original _Dead Space_. Isaac deleted them, since he had no reason to keep them. Then the console grabbed his crotch with a mechanical arm and shocked him.

"God I missed that." He said.

Isaac sauntered down the hall some more. He saw 2 soldiers with pulse rifles.

"Look! Some crazy guy! Kill him!" One of them yelled.

Suddenly, a tentacle broke through the ceiling vent, grabbed one of the soldiers by the leg, and yanked him into the ceiling. The other one shot his pulse rifle at it.

"STOP ASSHOLE! YOUR SHOOTING ME!" The first soldier said.

"WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!?" The second demanded.

"PULL ME OUT OF HERE!" The first one yelled.

The second soldier grabbed the first one's dangling arm. And, as you may have guessed, they both got pulled into the vent. Isaac ran over to where they were and guts fell on his head.

"Damn it, they didn't drop their guns." Isaac said, ignoring the guts.

Isaac entered what looked like an observation room. There was a video playing on a nearby screen. It was of a red-headed dude talking to the same doctor from earlier.

"Mr. Stross, what happened aboard the USG O'Bannon?" The Doctor asked.

"My wife and son, they became naked zombies. I had to kill them both. Then my girlfriend, I mean lab partner came in and called me a murderer." Stross said.

"Were they the only naked zombies?" The doctor asked.

"No, there were hundreds of them. It was like a massive orgy." Stross said.

"Ugh, thats disgusting." The doctor said.

"Then the magic goldfish gave me a key to open the portal to dreamland where I became king of the sweets." Stross said.

"Okay, Mr. Stross, your lab partner said that your wife and son were still human." The doctor said.

"She's a lying whore. Where is she by the way?" Stross asked.

"Uhhh, she was let go." The doctor said.

Flash back...

A woman in a green lab uniform with black hair was restrained on a table. A drill was aimed at her forehead.

"Are you serious? What the fuck? Can't you just shoot me through the back of the head like that one guy whose name I can't remember? You know, the one with the cybernetic arm? He was in _Dead Space Aftermath_ like me? Anyone?" She asked before the drill buried into her skull.

Back to the present...

"This is boring." Isaac said.

Isaac then noticed a med kit laying on the floor. He bent over to pick it up, but he couldn't because his arms were still binded. He tried to pick it up with his foot, but he dropped it on his other foot and fell over. Then he tried to pick it up with his mouth. He succeeded, but he accidentally opened the canister and the gel poured down his throat. Isaac choked, but then his innards felt strangely rejuvenated. His RIG was still red though, so it didn't make any difference.

Isaac came to a closed door. Since he still couldn't use his arms for anything, he hit the button with his head to open it. Then, all of the sudden, Isaac was pulled into the room by that doctor you all probably hate by now. He held a scalpel against Isaac's neck.

"What happened to you on the USG O'bannon?" The doctor asked, unstable.

"I wasn't on the USG O'bannon." Isaac said.

"Shut up! Do you think this interrogation shit is easy!?" The doctor demanded.

"Yes." Isaac said.

The doctor cut the things that were restraining Isaac's arms.

"Hey thanks." Isaac said.

Isaac turned around and clotheslined the doctor in the face with the slasher arm that was still stuck in his shoulder.

"Whoops, sorry." Isaac said.

"Your RIG is red. Theres a medical kit and flashlight inside that locker, along with a conveniently placed Locator." The Doctor said, pointing at a locker.

"Thanks. Here, let me repay you." Isaac said.

Isaac pulled the slasher blade out of his shoulder and decapitated the doctor with it.

"No ones gonna back stab me again!" Isaac yelled, spitting on his corpse.

Isaac cracked open the locker and grabbed the gubbins inside. He applied the medical kit to his unseeable wounds and picked up the flashlight and locator.

"Wow, this flashlight looks like a gun. I wonder if that will hold any significance." Isaac wondered.

Isaac went over to the elevator, called it, and got on and rode it to the next floor. A woman appeared on his video feed.

"Franco? Did you find Isaac yet?" The woman asked.

"Uhh, Franco isn't here. This is Isaac." Isaac said.

"Isaac? Thank Unitology. Wheres Franco?" The woman asked.

"Was he wearing a green jumpsuit?" Isaac asked.

"Yes! You've seen him!?" The woman asked, excited.

"Nope." Isaac lied.

"Oh, listen, you need to haul ass out of the hospital. I've plotted a route for you." The bitch said.

"Wait, don't I know you from somewhere?" Isaac asked.

"My name is Daina, and no, we haven't met." The bitch said.

"Are you sure? You look like someone who double crossed me." Isaac said.

"For fucks sake, we haven't met before!" Daina said.

"Are you sure?" Isaac asked.

"YES!" Daina yelled before ending the transmission.

The elevator stopped and it's doors opened. The room was dark. Isaac shone his flashlight around wildly, making sure it was clear. Isaac suddenly slipped on something as he walked down the hall and whatever it was landed on his face. It was an audio log.

"Our patients have been doing very unusual things. I just found Mr. 13 making a Marker like object with all of his lollipop sticks. Then Mr. Nukem was making them out of his pipe bombs. Why did we let him have pipe bombs anyway? That's a huge security hazard. Then there was that weird nutjob, Cash is his name I think, he made them out of bloody shards of glass. The researched teams have been notified of this discovery. Oh shit, Cash just broke out and stabbed my secretary! OH FU(a liquid spurts in the background). Now I'm going to make a marker out of his bones! HEHEHEHEEHHEHEHEHEEHEHEHE!" It said.

Isaac smashed the audio log against the floor. Then he continued down the hall and came to a red maintenance vent.

"Theres bond to be more necromorphs in there. They love dark places. Let's crawl inside!" Isaac said.

Isaac opened the hatch and crawled into the claustrophobic space. He sung the tune from _Space Runaway Ideon_ to pass the time in the worst voice possible.

"SPACE RUNAWAY IDEON, IDEON!" Isaac croaked.

The lower part of the vent must have hated his singing, since it collapsed and sent him falling down.

"OW! Wires! OW! Shards of metal! OW! Circuit boards! OW! Xbox one! Wait, what the-" Isaac started before he landed hard on a metal floor, leaving a crater.

"I should really condemn this hospital for faulty maintenance vents." Isaac said.

Isaac then saw a corpse floating in the air.

"Hey, it's just like in _Martian Gothic Unification_. Oh, I shouldn't have said that." Isaac said, puking on the corpse. "Why is this thing even floating?"

Isaac looked behind himself and saw a console emitting some faint electrical energy.

"A KINESIS MODULE!" Isaac yelped.

Isaac quickly ran behind the console. He ripped the panel off and threw it at a cabinet filled with AIDS vaccines, breaking them. Then he ripped a bunch of wires out of the panel and placed them on his left arm. The corpse fell to the floor due to the loss of the module. Isaac picked up the corpse with the kinesis module and threw it against the wall.

"I missed this thing." Isaac said.

Suddenly, a slasher broke in through the glass wall. On instinct, Isaac aimed his flashlight at the slasher and pulled it's trigger, only shining light on it.

"Damn." Isaac said.

The slasher chased Isaac around the room several times before Isaac stabbed his foot on a metal spike on the floor.

"OW! Why the hell did they leave these sharp metal spears here!? Thats dangerous! And what the fuck are these even used for?" Isaac wondered.

Angry Isaac picked up the metal spike and shot it off blindly with kinesis. It impaled the slasher and pinned it to a wall.

"Hmmm." Isaac said.

Suddenly another slasher appeared. Isaac picked up another spike and impaled it against the wall as well.

"Ha Ha. This is like syfy darts." Isaac said.

Suddenly another slasher broke into the room. This time there weren't any more spikes left. SO Isaac just ran around again. Then he cut his arm on one of the slasher's arms that was pinned to the wall.

"That is also very dangerous." Isaac said.

Isaac ripped off the arm with his kinesis module and blindly shot it into the slasher that was pursuing him, pinning it to the wall.

"Oh, that simplifies everything." Isaac said.

Isaac came to another elevator. He got on and found a small medical kit on the floor.

"Good, I can finally pick stuff up now." Isaac said.

Isaac shoved it somewhere in his ripped straightjacket and rode the elevator. After it reached the next floor, a slasher ran towards Isaac.

"I'll just rip off his arm." Isaac said.

Isaac tried to pull the slasher's blade arm off with his kinesis module, but it wouldn't come off for some reason.

"Come off motherfucker!" Isaac cursed, actually grabbing the slasher's arm. "I can pull them off dead corpses, I should be able to pull them off live ones too!"

Isaac slapped the slasher with his flashlight a few times before he broke it's arm off and he stabbed the slasher with it.

"Tai-oh!" Isaac said.

Then 2 other slashers started running at him. Isaac pulled off the dead slasher's other arm and shot it at one of the runners. Then the began pulling the one he stabbed into the dead slasher out of it's guts. He barely pulled it out in time and swung it around, cutting both of the other slasher's arms off.

"These things have weak limbs." Isaac said.

Isaac continued down the hall and saw a small square shaped box.

"Oh, this must be the new design for the item crates!" Isaac said.

Isaac stomped on the box with his foot and howled in pain as he was bare foot. Still, he got a Small med pack out of it.

"Hello? Is somebody out there? Help me!" A voice yelled.

Isaac investigated the direction the voice came from and found a guy strapped down to a surgery table with some weird arm with a laser sight above him

"Oh My god." Isaac said.

"Thank lord, someone came here to help me!" The guy said.

Isaac completely ignored the defenseless man and ran to the control console behind him.

"Thats a plasma cutter! I can use that!" Isaac said.

"Forget the stupid plasma cutter and get me out of here!" The guy said.

"Shut up, now let's just press this." Isaac said.

Isaac pressed some buttons and moved the arm closer to him.

"What the hell are planning on doing dude? Just get me outta here!" The guy said.

"I said shut up!" Isaac hissed.

Isaac picked up a bottle of aspirin and threw it at the guy's head.

"Ow." he said.

"Now I'll just take this off." Isaac said, ripping the plasma cutter off it's arm.

"Uhh, weird guy." the guy on the table said as slashers began smashing the windows.

"I said shut up!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac picked up a hypodermic needle and threw it at the guy dart style, hitting him in the nads.

"Now, I just connect these here and it's ready to go! Alright whiny bitch, why are you-" Isaac started.

Isaac looked at the table the guy was strapped down to and saw he was cut up by 2 slashers.

"Oh." Isaac said.

Isaac took aim with his flashlight, now with the plasma cutter attached, and fired 2 blasts at each slasher's arm, severing them. The slashers dropped dead, knowing that their hopes and dreams were gone without their arms. Isaac went over to the guy on the table.

"Uhh, sorry I couldn't save you, but you were an asshole." Isaac said.

Isaac left the operating room and entered another operating room where a slasher was strapped to the table.

"Ha hA! Come on bitch! Slash me!" Isaac teased.

The slasher tried in vain to break free. Isaac smashed it's arms off with his makeshift Plasma cutter, killing it.

"You got nothing!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac went through a door into the waiting area. He saw some slashers sitting on the couches, waiting for him to come out. They foolishly charged into his plasma cutter, killing them. Isaac found another boring text log that he read while sitting on the couch.

"Some of the patients are becoming restless. We recently had to begin giving them Memory deleting drugs. It's really annoying that they don't remember who we are everyday and we have to keep explaining to them that they're in a new section of Disney land and they can get on the rides tomorrow after testing. This one idiot tried to rape one of the nurses, which is why every morning, we have to keep telling him his lack of genitals was from a birth defect." It said.

Isaac threw the diary away and he heard voices.

"So who are we looking for again?" A voice said.

"Isaac Clarke, he's a threat to the station." Another voice said.

"Why?" The first voice asked.

"I don't give a shit why! Just follow the orders and we get our paychecks!" The second one said.

"I'm gonna buy an Xbox one when I get paid." The first voice said.

"Are you crazy? Those things are fucking shit bricks!" The second one said.

"Your just mad because your limited edition 360 will be outclassed." The first said.

"You don't shut up, I'm gonna outclass you with my pulse rifle." The second said.

"Fine, let's check out this dead naked human with blades growing out of it's arms." The first said.

"Theres no way that could still be alive." The second said.

Then loud screaming was heard. Isaac was rested enough to continue moving. He walked down a ramp and suddenly, red lights flashed. Isaac came to a large open room where he saw the red-headed guy from the video feed.

"Isaac! This way!" The man yelled.

"Do I know you?" Isaac asked.

"Theres no time! We have to go!" The man yelled.

Isaac ran after the guy through a hallway, when a security gate closed, separating them.

"Oh fuck, we'll meet up later!" The man said, running away.

"Wait, who the fuck are you?" Isaac loudly asked.

"Isaac? Why didn't you leave before the lockdown? I told you to hurry!" Daina said.

"No you didn't." Isaac said.

"Don't blame your lazy ass on me." Daina said.

"You know what? I don't want your worthless help. You remind me too much about my computer specialist that backstabbed me. Fuck off." Isaac said.

"Fine, fuck you." Daina said.

"Fuck you." Isaac said.

"Fuck you!" Daina yelled.

"FUCK YOU!" Isaac yelled, shutting off the feed.

Some slashers stormed in the room. Isaac sliced both arms off of one of them before running out of ammo.

"Crap, I'm used to having loads of ammo." Isaac said.

Isaac barely dodged to the side as a Slasher lunged at him, stabbing it's blade into a priceless painting on the wall. Isaac grabbed a dead slasher's arm and impaled the one slasher to the wall with it. Then he grabbed one of those slasher's arms and impaled the last one with it.

"Where do I go now? I'm used to having someone tell me where I need to go." Isaac said.

Isaac started back the way he came and walked in a big circle a back into the room he just killed the slashers in.

"Uhh, Daina, I'm sorry. Your actually much more attractive than Kendra. Can you guide me out of here?" Isaac asked.

"So you've crawled back to me eh? Just follow your marker thing." Daina said.

Another gate rose up and Isaac left the room. He found another stupid ass text log.

"Please turn away all delusional patients. Leonard accidentally ordered a shipment of Eppicack instead of delusion treating medications and now theres puke everywhere. God, we have so many retards in this hospital. Last night, I saw Jeremiah smoking all the medical marijuana. I'm the only responsible person at this building. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get drunk on medical alcohol." It said.

Isaac threw the audio diary away and before entering a room, a guy in a blue shirt and jeans started choking him with a plastic bag. Isaac was used to shit like this and he kicked that guy's ass. It was Cash from _Manhunt_.

"Who the hell are you?" Isaac asked.

"A bunch of crazy religious guys grabbed me and now I'm slaughtering them all." Cash said.

"You need some help? I could use a companion character." Isaac said.

"No way, I fly solo. The last time I had a partner, they wouldn't stop following me." Cash said.

Cash ran into the room ahead and was decapitated by a slasher, which Isaac killed with a slasher blade he took with him.

"That was a pointless celebrity cameo." Isaac said.

Isaac grabbed some ammo laying on the ground and picked up another text log.

"Stasis bed 000567844. replaced tachyon unit, degaussed emitter array. calibrated Heisenberg forks. Induction coil still not firing in sequence. Testing for shattered matrix. Called in to dispatch to cancel next appointment. To make things simple for the retards at this hospital, is broken, fix it." It said.

"Stasis modules!? Heck yes!" Isaac said happily.

Isaac saw a panel with 2 gears on it. He ripped it off and threw it at a glass cabinet containing vials for the cancer cure, smashing them. Then Isaac reached his hand deep inside the panel. A little circle appeared on a screen with a line.

"What the hell? I never had to do this before." Isaac said.

As Isaac moved his hand around the panel, the line in the circle moved as well, changing from orange to blue. He took that as the sign to pull something out and he did this several times before he pulled out the source of the stasis module.

"Hell yes!" Isaac said, strapping it to his arm.

Isaac then began to proceed to a door before some weird scanning thing ran itself over him and shut the door.

"Identification not valid." A voice said.

"Screw your identification!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac backed up and allowed the door to open again. Then he hit it with stasis, slowing it down. Isaac ran towards it, the beam scanned him, but the doors weren't able to close fast enough.

"As I said, screw your identification." Isaac said.

Isaac proceeded down the hall as a man with half of his body melted off approached him.

"My god, it's one of the deleted enemies from _Resident Evil_!" Isaac panicked.

Isaac shot the dude's head off, causing him to drop dead. Suddenly, 2 unknown necromorphs trundled in from around the corner.

"These must be the new Necromorphs I saw in the trailer for this game." Isaac said.

One of these guys spat a glob of some gooey shit at Isaac. It hit him, not doing damage, but slowed him down.

"What the? Is this like adhesive fluid? Did an infector fuck a spray bottle?" Isaac wondered.

Isaac tried to put some distance between him and the Pukers, but he could only walk very slowly. One of the pukers calmly walked up to him and vomited some acidic fluid on him.

"OWWW! EWWW! You bulimic freak!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac shot the puker's head off with his plasma cutter.

"HAH! Try puking now!" Isaac taunted.

The Puker then puked on Isaac through the hole in it's neck.

"Are you serious!?" Isaac demanded.

Isaac shot off it's legs, then stomped on it. It's body spewed more acid, burning Isaac's foot.

"This enemy is way overpowered!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac didn't take any chances with the second puker and blew off all of it's limbs. Isaac mopped up the mess on the floor so no one would slip (He used to be a janitor) and took an elevator down. Isaac then found himself in a gift shop filled with balloons, plushes, and ammo. Isaac grabbed a Hello Kitty plush and hugged it.

"I used to have one of these when I was little! But then I gave it to Nicole." Isaac said, crying.

Suddenly, the plushes sprang to life with demonic eyes and sharp fangs. They all swarmed on Isaac, clinging to every part of his body while he screamed. Isaac began throwing them off and shooting them with his plasma cutter, sending stuffing flying everywhere.

"Fuck this shop!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac threw a plush of Twilight Sparkle off and grabbed a random can of gasoline. He poured it all over the place while swatting away the plushes. Then, he lit a match and threw it in the gasoline. All the plushes burst into flames and the balloons popped. Isaac dove out the doorway and shoved a random refrigerator in front of the door. The plushes banged on it angerly.

"I'm never gonna hug another plush again." Isaac said.

Isaac walked down a hallway towards a window that looked outside the station. An oxygen canister sitting next to the window exploded from Gunfire. The window shattered and began sucking everything out. Francis from _Left 4 Dead_ was sucked out.

"WHY THE HELL DID I SHOOT THAT THING!?" He screamed before being thrown into space.

Isaac clawed at the floor trying to avoid being sucked out. Gurneys and other hospital equipment was sucked out along with a random cow. Isaac noticed a bright light above the window. Knowing glowing stuff was meant to be shot, he shot it and a shutter closed over the vacuum.

"Damn, faulty windows too? I'll have this building condemned!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac got up and stepped over a dead slasher on the floor. Except it wasn't dead. It stabbed Isaac in the leg and made him fall down.

"What the hell are you doing!? Taking a nap in the middle of the hallway!?" Isaac demanded.

Isaac smacked the slasher's arm a couple of times, breaking it, then he shot it up with his plasma cutter. Isaac then entered the next room, which had a kiosk in it. Isaac, for some stupid reason, ignored it and went over to the door on the other side of the room.

"Warning, hullbreach detected." A voice said.

"Hull breach? How am I supposed to proceed then? Unless, they gave me the ability to breath in a vacuum!" Isaac said cheerfully.

Isaac opened the door and ran into the hull breached corridor.

"Yes, this is AACCCCCKKK ACCGGHH!" He choked.

Isaac ran back into the other room and closed the door.

"How the hell do I get past this!? I don't have enough credits to buy a new space suit!" Isaac said.

"Actually, the kiosks on Sprawl have discounts Isaac. You may be able to get your old armor for free." Daina said.

"Really?" Isaac asked.

"What? Do I have to sing a song or something, yes!" Daina said.

Isaac went up to the kiosk and sure enough, his old RIG armor was free.

"Sweet! My armor insurance really did pay off!" Isaac said.

Isaac got into the tiny room behind the kiosk and it closed. Following a minute of loud laughter, the chamber opened, Revealing a helmet-less Isaac in his brown RIG armor.

"I could have sworn I painted this white on the last story. Oh well." Isaac said.

A helmet unfolded over Isaac's head as he looked at the Kiosk's shopping list.

"Hey, they have my old Plasma cutter too!" Isaac squealed with delight.

Isaac pressed the plasma cutter icon and his old plasma cutter slid out of a drop slot.

"WOO HOO! Now I can duel cut!" Isaac said, holding both plasma cutters.

Isaac went back through the door and was able to calmly stroll through the breached area. He arrived in the emergency arrival area.

"Hmm, normally the first chapter ends with an epic battle. I guess they changed things up this time around." Isaac said.

Suddenly, a blonde chick in white clothes and a nearly bald dude in black clothes ran in through the doors.

"We're hear! Now we can use your blood to make an antidote for all the infected people!" The blonde chick said.

"Yeah, hopefully nothing will crush me before we do." The nearly bald dude said.

Suddenly, this large Necromorph with 2 massive legs crushed the blonde chick and nearly bald dude.

"Well that was inevitable." Isaac said.

The tripod swatted Isaac into the air and he slammed into a stasis station groin first, which somehow recharged his stasis module. He fell on his head and leaned against the wall upside down. The Tripod was about to crush him, but Isaac hit him with stasis. The monster's large arm moved slowly as Isaac was able to calmly maneuver around it and walked behind it.

Isaac drew both of his plasma cutters and emptied them both into the tripod's right arm, causing it's orange bulb to burst and it fell off. Isaac laughed and taunted the tripod, calling it crippled, and then got slammed across the room. Isaac hid behind a pillar, hoping the monster would be too stupid to see him. The Tripod smashed the pillar, narrowly missing Isaac.

Isaac hid behind more stuff, all of which the tripod smashed with it's remaining arm. Isaac aimed both of his plasma cutter's at it's last orange bulb, but they both just clicked because they were empty. The Tripod raised it's one arm.

"Well, looks like I'm gonna get replaced by a new player character." Isaac said.

Suddenly, the ceiling collapsed and crushed the Tripod to death. The tripod spit a gold semi-conductor out of it's mouth, covered in puke and shit. Isaac cautiously picked it up, put it in a plastic bag, and put it in his suit.

"Well, I guess I'm going to be the only player character for this entire series!" Isaac said happily.

Gabe Weller snorted with contempt somewhere as Isaac went through the hallway the tripod came out of. He came to another vent, this one had a kinesis icon panel on it.

"Okay, now this is just plain ineffective." Isaac said.

Isaac ripped the panel off and threw it away. Before he crawled into the vent, he stuck an orange piece of paper on the wall.

"This damn vent better be sturdy." Isaac said, crawling in.

"By Order of the CEC, this building is now Condemned." The orange piece of paper said.

Meanwhile, back in the hospital...

2 soldiers were in the area that contained the patients in stasis. They had a containment coffin pulled and one of them was in the process of jamming it open with a crowbar.

"Theres no way he's still in one of these." The first soldier said.

"Oh come on? Maybe theres some hot comatose chick inside that we can bang." The second said.

"Good point." The first one said, helping with the crowbar.

They managed to force the lid of the coffin open. Inside was a man with a familiar blue vest.

"Awww, it's a dude, an ugly one at that." The first soldier said.

"I don't know. Theres something seductive about him." The second soldier said.

"Eww, don't get all gay on me!" The First soldier said.

Richard opened his eyes. He noticed the soldiers with guns didn't look like any nurses he's ever seen. He gazed around the room for some kind of weapon. And he found one, a pair of tongs.

"Look, I grew up with 3 older brother who raped me all the time." The Second soldier said.

Richard suddenly jumped out of the coffin and strangled the second soldier with the tongs. The first soldier shot his pulse rifle, aiming for Richard, but shooting and killing the second soldier. Richard grabbed the second soldier's pulse rifle and aimed it at the first one.

"Drop it." Richard said.

The first soldier dropped his pulse rifle. When it hit the floor, it fired one last round, which bounced around the room, before smashing a case filled with Cure Alls. Isaac let the dead soldier fall to the floor and smashed the first soldier's head in with the Pulse Rifle's stock. Isaac looked around the room until one of the names on the coffin's caught his attention.

"Rebecca!?" He read out loud.

Richard pulled out the coffin and the other ones that had familiar names on them. And one that had Murphy Pendleton from _Silent Hill Downpour_. Within a few minutes, everyone was awake. Richard took the first soldier's armor, leaving the soldier tied up in a chair in his _Dora the Explorer_ undies and a red ball gag in his mouth. Raz, Milly, Arcano, Chris, Gex, Faith, and Vincent were all of Richard's other friends.

"This is just perfect." Richard said.

"No it isn't! We was captured!" Raz said.

"Shut up." Richard said.

"What happened to those Psychological 7 fucks?" Rebecca asked.

Meanwhile, in a tiny shuttle drifting in space, was the psychological 7. Ethan Thomas, Jack Walters, Daniel, Roger Samms, Jennifer, the guy from _The Dark Eye_, and Benny.

"That was close. We barely avoided our captors and escaped on this tiny shuttle." Thomas said, with Benny's foot in his face.

"Thats an accurate summary of our misfortunes." Benny said.

"SO what now?" Jennifer asked.

"We just wait, I'm sure someone will rescue us soon." Thomas said.

"You said that 7 months ago." Jack said.

"Aww shut up." Thomas said.

Back on the Sprawl (Oops, spoiler alert)...

"Well, the only way we can get some answers is through this guy." Richard said, pointing to the soldier.

"I can make him talk." Rebecca said, taking off her shirt.

"Sorry babe, but only I can look at your breasts. I got another idea." Richard said.

Richard took off his belt and wheeled the man into another room before closing the door. Loud whipping could be heard.

"So...Why are you here?" Vincent asked Murphy.

"Well, you see..." He started.

To Be continued...

**Damn, this took much longer than I thought. It was for many reasons, lack of interest, writing the outline for it, and other stuff such as drawing. Hopefully the next chapter will come sooner, but no promises. And don't nag me for updates either, that is very inefficient. I'll see you suckers then.**


	2. New arriving at HELL STATION!

Chapter 2: Now arriving at HELL STATION!

Isaac fell face first out of the opposite end of the vent.

"Well then, I'd say that went pretty well." Isaac said.

Isaac found himself in some kind of store. There was a kiosk and workbench here. After leaving some credits on the counter for some Air head bars, he opened the work bench and took a look at his original plasma cutter.

"What the?! Someone took out all the power nodes! Those asswipes!" Isaac said, slamming the workbench shut.

Isaac picked up another corny audio log.

"Listen, I know I've left like 100 of these messages around, but I want to leave a few more. Shoot off their limbs! It's their weakness! Tell everyone you know so I'll stop leaving these everywhere!" It said.

Isaac got rid of the audio log and stopped at the kiosk.

"Good, my line gun is in stock. Wait, whats this? A Javelin Gun? Hmmm." Isaac said.

Isaac purchased the Javelin gun instead of the Line gun.

"I have no idea what kind of maintenance this is used for, but it looks handy against Necromorphs!" Isaac said.

Isaac left the store and entered what looked like a shopping district. Isaac stepped onto a moving sidewalk and fell down.

"Whoa, Richard told me he encountered these before." Isaac said.

Suddenly a slasher ran towards Isaac. Isaac ran the other way on the moving sidewalk, which didn't get him anywhere. Right before the slasher cut Isaac a new one, Isaac quickly spun around and shot a javelin at it. The Javelin pierced the slasher's torso and sent it soaring across the room into a nearby tortilla shop.

Isaac looked at his new gun and spun it around. As he advanced down the hall, Isaac found a locked storage room with a socket for a power node next to the door. He shot the socket with his Javelin gun and it opened. Inside, he found ammo, schematic for power nodes, and a text log.

"Quarterly report. Homeless workers now litter the hallways of the station. After that stupid Ishimura thing, Planetcracking is no longer the top business. Now Planet sealing is on top and we lack the facilities needed for that. We've been trying to find other things to replace Planetcracking. We've tried Tourist attracting, Military production, and even Whorehouses, nothing worked. Then those corny religious guys came by and started researching that weird obelisk thing. These guys eat a lot of fast food, so now our fast food markets are booming! Recession over!" It said.

Isaac left the storage room and continued down the hall. A Civilian ran towards him.

"HELP ME! THEY'RE GONNA STAB ME!" The civilian yelled.

"Actually they prefer to slash people." Isaac said.

And then a slasher ran up behind the civilian and stabbed him through the head.

"That was a very poorly designed name for this enemy." Isaac said.

Isaac severed the slasher's limbs with his plasma cutters to save ammo for his javelin gun. Then he turned around and shot the slasher that was trying to ambush him from behind who was roaring very loud. Isaac took the dead civilian's credits, since he wouldn't need them anymore, and got on an elevator.

"Richard would probably put up a forged Certificate of Authenticity right now. Wait, where is Richard!?" Isaac worried.

Before a cut away scene could commence, the elevator stopped. The inner door opened, but the outer door only partially opened. A civilian was on the other side.

"Oh crap!" Isaac said.

Isaac tried to pry the doors open so the civilian could get in.

"Holy crap, your attempting to save me! Have you finally realized that your revenge shouldn't be dealt on innocents?" The civilian asked.

"Well, theres that too, but mostly because I want your credits. My plasma cutter isn't going to upgrade itself." Isaac said.

Before the conversation could continue, a slasher ran up behind the civilian and stabbed him.

"Quick! Give me your credits!" Isaac demanded.

The civilian flipped off Isaac as the elevator doors closed and the lift ascended. When they opened, Isaac found himself on a high floor. He went over to a balcony and saw a bunch of dead people on the floor below.

"How did this place get so fucked?" Isaac asked himself.

"ISAAC!" A voice across the massive room yelled.

Isaac looked across from his balcony and saw that red headed guy from the hospital on another Balcony. He opened a Video Feed.

"Isaac, they made us play bad video games so we would forget, but I'm remembering now!" The nut job said.

"Do I know you?" Isaac asked.

"You see? You forgot as well!" The nut job said.

"But who-" Isaac started.

"ISAAC LOOK OUT!" The nut job yelled.

Isaac looked at the railing and saw a leaper climbing up with one arm. He shot that one arm off and the leaper fell to it's death. Isaac looked across from the balcony and saw that the nut job had fled.

"Daina, some weird oh red headed guy says he knows me." Isaac said.

"Thats Nolan Stross, don't trust him Isaac, he killed his own wife and child." Daina said.

"Hmm, Richard would have a witty comeback to that." Isaac said.

Isaac walked down the hall and smashed a box that had some Javelin bolts in it. Then he saw some civilians run past him further down the hall.

"Quick man, we can take as many Tortillas as we want now that there are no guards!" One of them said.

"What if the monsters got there first?" The other asked.

"Theres no way these things like Tortillas." The first one said.

Isaac paid no mind to the foolish civilians, as he had no interest in Tortillas. Just as he walked past another door, a slasher burst through it and stabbed him in the back. Isaac tapped the A button and threw him off. He fired a javelin, but missed and hit the wall next to it. When he attempted to fire again, he pressed the alternate fire trigger and the javelin that was fired emitted electricity from itself and fried the slasher until it's limbs fell off.

"I really wish I knew what this was used for." Isaac said.

Isaac continued down the hall and found an open apartment door. He went inside and began tearing the place apart, looking for credits. Then he looked in the bathroom and saw a legless puker puking in the toilet. It's acidic puke melted the toilet itself. Isaac executed it for destroying property, despite the fact that Isaac himself took 5000 credits that were under a pillow.

Isaac calmly strolled out, whistling happily, then a slasher ran up from behind and stabbed him in the back again. Isaac bashed the slasher repeatedly with his plasma cutter, broke off it's arm, picked it up with Kinesis, and impaled the slasher on the wall. He then used a small med on the holes in his back, with were sealed.

Isaac entered the laundry room.

"Whoa, this is convenient." Isaac said.

Isaac reached into his suit and after fiddling around inside it, he pulled out his Hello Kitty Underwear.

"These really need a good wash." Isaac said.

Isaac put his underwear in the washing machine and added some Tide powder to it. He closed the hatch and turned it on. Then a slasher jumped down from the ceiling.

"Oh come on, I'm doing the laundry!" Isaac complained.

Isaac dismembered the slasher, and then a leaper jumped down from the ceiling. It jumped at Isaac, who shielded himself with some old lady's under britches. The leaper launched head first into them and got stuck. Isaac threw it in the dryer, shut the door, and turned it on. The leaper was violently tossed around inside the dryer.

A puker was the next to drop from the ceiling. Before it could vomit, Isaac hit it with stasis, slowing it down. He grabbed some bleach and poured it down the pukers mouth. The puker tried to puke on Isaac, but it couldn't, because the bleach cleared all the puke out of it's system. Isaac easily dismembered it.

Isaac heard the washing machine ding. He opened it and took his now clean undies out. He squeezed the water out of them and stuffed them back in his suit. Isaac left the laundry room and eventually came to a terrace. He found a text log laying there.

"History of Planetcracking: Planetcracking first became feasible in the decades following the discovery of the Unified Field Theory, which allowed us to control the gravitron in the same manner we were accustomed to controlling the electron" It started.

All the big words made Isaac's head hurt and he threw the text log over the side of the terrace. He got on another elevator and rode it to another floor.

"Daina, why are there Necromorphs here? I destroyed the Marker." Isaac said.

"Tiedemann built another one." Daina said.

"Whose Tiedemann? He sounds fat." Isaac asked.

"He's the Governor of the Sprawl." Daina said.

"Where is this damn marker?" Isaac asked.

"DON'T YOU DARE CALL OUR SACRED RELIC THAT!" Daina yelled.

"What?" Isaac asked.

"I mean, it's in the government sector, but you have to meet up with me at the Church of Unitology first." Daina said.

"Why there? Hello?" Isaac asked before Daina hung up.

Isaac arrived at another apartment block. He found another open door and looted it again. Then as he walked down the hallway, a slasher burst through a door and stabbed him. Isaac did the usual routine of throwing it off, pumping it with plasma, and healing. Isaac then came to the concourse of this area. It was bloody dark. Isaac shone his flashlight around and looked at a train schedule.

"Let's see. Government Sector, Hospital, Decommissioned Solar Array, here it is, Church of Unitology. I can't believe they got their own stop." Isaac said.

Isaac walked down the dark hallway and stepped over a slasher corpse that stabbed him in the leg.

"That is a very poor behavior." Isaac said, stomping on it.

An exploder waddled in from around the corner.

"Oh, you guys are still in the game? I thought they'd replace you." Isaac said.

Isaac shot it's explosive sack arm, blowing it up. Then it was followed by 3 more marching towards Isaac in a straight line. Isaac blew up the first one, who in turn blew up the others. Then 6 more showed up stacked up like a pyramid. Isaac blew them up as well, completely ravaging the concourse, which would cost millions of credits to rebuild and would devastate the economy.

Anyway, Isaac calmly walked into the actual transmit system. He checked the tracks to make sure there were no doorways in the tunnels. He saw what happened to that ugly blonde teen in _Silent Hill 3_ when she tried to open one. Fortunately, there were none, and a tram was already at the station.

"Oh good, looks like something finally might go right." Isaac said stupidly.

And then he looked inside the tram's window and saw an Infector necromorph plunging it's tube tongue into the head of a corpse.

"Hmmm, what did infectors do again?" Isaac wondered.

The corpse grew 2 new arms out of it's shoulders and it's jaw fell off.

"Oh right." Isaac said.

The tram's doors opened and the new slasher stormed out towards Isaac. Isaac cut it's legs off and mocked it before stomping it to death. Then he looked right and saw the infector infecting something else.

"Oh hell no!" Isaac said.

Isaac cut off it's tongue and wings, killing it. Then he bashed the corpse apart to make sure it wouldn't get up. Isaac looked around the transit area for random items that seem completely out of place. You know, the staple of Survival Horror games. He found a medium med kit and schematic for stasis packs. When that was all done with, he got on the tram and sat down. He grabbed a magazine, waiting for the tram to start.

"Who knew using pigs for fuel was unethical?" Isaac asked himself.

Isaac wondered what was keeping the tram from leaving. Then he remembered that the Tram operator was probably fucking dead. He went up to the front of the car he was in and found another panel with gear icons on it.

"They really love this hacking mini game. It would have been more impressive if _Bioshock_ didn't beat us to it." Isaac said.

Isaac tore the cover off and jammed his arm up into the recess of the panel. He saw the gauge appear on the monitor.

"I'm not sure if I made this joke already, but why is this timed? Is there a security measure? For a tram?" Isaac asked.

Isaac pulled a wire out when the little spinner thing was orange and felt pain in his arm.

"What the hell did that? Did I pull out an active fuse?" Isaac asked himself.

Little did Isaac know, some prankster stuck a hermit crab inside the cabinet and it pinched Isaac's arm whenever the spinny thing was orange. Isaac failed to hack it before the gauge ran out and it fired a bunch of static into his helmet. He tried again and it worked this time. Isaac fell flat on his face as the train suddenly began moving.

"Ahh, good. Now I can continue my read of the Scientific advancements in Industrial London." Isaac said.

Suddenly, Isaac heard loud noises in the adjacent car. He went through the connecting doorway and saw 2 slashers.

"Can you keep it down? I'm trying to read!" Isaac yelled.

The slashers charged at Isaac, who killed them with his Javelin gun. Suddenly a puker smashed through the ceiling. Before he shot it however, something else smashed through the ceiling into the car. It was a guy in a gray trench coat, black beanie with blonde hair, and gloves. He punched the Puker in the gut and it vomited on him. He recoiled back in pain. Isaac finished off the Puker and went over to the random dude.

"Umm, are you alright?" Isaac asked.

"Hang on. Paradigm shift!" The guy yelled.

A green aura surrounded the guy and then vanished. The guy threw some blue energy balls in the air and let them land on himself, which sealed his wounds.

"Alright, I guess intros are in order. I'm Snow, leader of NOVA." The guy said.

"Whats NOVA stand for?" Isaac asked.

"It stands for...I really don't know." Snow said.

Suddenly, loud growling could be heard in the next car.

"Oh shit. More of those naked freaks." Snow said.

Snow charged into the next car and got vomited on again. Isaac killed it with his Javelin gun.

"Do you need help now?" Isaac asked.

"No, I just need to change my paradigm again." Snow said.

Isaac just poured some med gel on him, which healed his wounds.

"Whoa, that works way better than my cure spells." Snow said.

"Your not as Funny as Richard, but you'll do for now." Isaac said.

"Thanks I guess." Snow said.

The car shook violently.

"Oh no! The car disconnected! We have to move!" Isaac said.

The guys ran to the door and Isaac shoved it off it's rail. The car ahead was drifting away from them.

"We have to get to that car!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac picked up Snow and threw him at the car. He smashed through the door and landed inside the car. Isaac jumped towards the car and activated his suit's thrusters. As he flew towards the car, he dodged a piece of metal, a cow, and ahomeless person. He finally got to the car and saw Snow getting his ass kicked by a Puker.

"Don't worry about me, I have my Sentinel Paradigm active." Snow said.

An exploder slammed it's sack on Snow, killing the Puker and knocked Snow to the floor.

"You aren't very good at this." Isaac said.

"I'm just a little rusty, thats all." Snow said, coughing up blood.

Suddenly, the train that was going at mach speed stopped completely, which threw both of the guys down the cars, soaring past necromorphs and through them in one case. Snow smashed through the roof of a dangling car and was embedded in a wall, while Isaac's legs got caught on some cables and he dangled upside down.

"Well, at least there are no necromorphs around." Isaac said.

Then some exploders crawled out of the vents and began waddling towards Isaac.

"Motherfucking parodies and their Irony!" Isaac yelled.

Isaac blasted the exploders' sacks with his plasma cutter before they got too close. They blew up crates of Contact Beams, Pulse Rifles, and rocket launchers when the died. Snow flailed his legs around as he was stuck in the wall.

"Good, that seems to be all of them, now to deal with this cable." Isaac said.

Isaac shot the cable a few times with his plasma cutter only to find out it didn't do anything.

"Curses, they laced the cables with asteroid rubber!" Isaac said.

Suddenly, Isaac felt the train rumble. He looked at a glass of water on the floor and saw it ripple along with the rumbling. As it suddenly sounded like it was next to Isaac. A Brute popped out of the car.

"Oh dear, do you require assistance kind sir?" The brute asked in it's native tongue.

"AAAAAHHHHHH" Isaac screamed

Isaac pulled out his second Plasma cutter and fired them one after the other at the glowing orange spot on the brute's shoulder.

"Stop! I'm a vegetarian, I swear it!" The brute begged.

Isaac severed it's right arm and the brute died of blood loss. The cable that had Isaac's leg snapped and Isaac fell to the ground.

"Yes, I'm free and safe!" Isaac yelled happily.

Just then, Isaac noticed a trail of gas moving close to a sparking cable.

"Oh shit." Isaac said.

Isaac dove to the ground as the tram exploded, leaving him unharmed. He got up and looked at the damage.

"Yes, I'm still safe!" Isaac said.

Just then, the brute's severed arm hit Isaac over the head and knocked him out.

Meanwhile, back at the Hospital, Richard's group had made their way to the Emergency arrival section. They brought the captured soldier along, who was still duct taped to a chair and gagged with a sock.

"Holy shit, what the fuck is this thing?" Richard asked, stomping on the remains of the tripod.

"I don't know. Maybe it's something from _Lightning Returns Final Fantasy 13_." Vincent said.

"I think your right." Richard said, staring hard at it's dead face.

"I'm fucking joking. It's a motherfucking necromorph!" Vincent yelled.

"Hey take it easy, no need to be tense, we're home free. Though you can be tense if you want, I think thats sexy." Richard said.

"Ahem, I'm right here." Rebecca said.

"Bec, this is man talk!" Richard said.

"I'm a fucking woman!" Vincent yelled.

Suddenly, the sound of a dropship could be heard.

"A rescue chopper, we're going to be saved!" Rebecca cheered.

The dropship came in view. The gang ran towards it, waving their arms and cheering. The dropship landed and a guy in a military suit and cowboy hat walked out.

"Woo hoo! Thank god you...do I know you?" Faith asked.

"Nope, we've never met." The man said.

"Are you sure? You look like one of the guys who got kidnapped along with me and we left behind because he was so annoying." Faith said.

"No, we have never met. And my name most certainly isn't Dexter. And I'm definitely not trying to kill this guy." The man said, pointing at Richard.

"Oh okay." Faith said.

"Thank god, we don't have to be in another _Dead Space_ game." Richard said.

"Yeah, you'll just be dead in space." Dexter said.

When Richard was looking away (He was staring at Vincent, who bent over to look for ammo), Dexter pointed a P-Sec pistol at his head. Faith saw this and kicked him in the ribs. He fell over, shooting and missing Richard.

"Faith, I know you have a thing for me. But you can't make me jealous by kicking this guy." Richard said.

"He was trying to shoot you dumbass!" Faith yelled.

"Don't be silly, perhaps he was shooting a Necromorph behind me." Richard said.

"She's right dumbshit." Dexter said.

Dexter sat up and aimed his gun at Richard again. Faith kicked him in the back of the head, causing him to flop his face into one of the tripod's severed legs.

"Okay, I guess I was wrong." Richard said.

Richard took Dexter's gun and gave it to Rebecca.

"Vinny, do you know how to fly that thing?" Richard asked.

"I took a few courses. And don't you ever call me Vinny again or I'll bite your nuts off." Vincent said.

"Oooh, thats sexy." Richard said.

"Just get in the fucking dropship." Rebecca said.

Dexter sat up again only to get kicked down by Richard this time. The gang crowded into the dropship, taking the captured soldier and gagged with them, and lifted off. Vincent immediately crashed it into a pillar.

"Be more careful, this is our only ticket out of here!" Richard yelled.

"It'd be easier without your yelling!" Vincent yelled back.

"Why are we taking this gagged guy anyway? He doesn't really have to be here does he?" Rebecca asked.

"I thought it would be funny if we took him along." Richard said.

Dexter got up yet again, only to have the pillar fall on him.

"This is gonna be harder than I thought." Dexter said.

To be continued...


End file.
